As printed in the Presidio Sentinel, San Diego, July 2010
I’m not sure whether it’s my parents’ depression-era heritage or a natural…um, thriftiness, but if there’s a discount coupon that applies, I don’t leave home without it.
That’s what brought us to a newish Chinese/Japanese cafe in Hillcrest, with a coupon for one free entree with one paid. Service: sweet and warm. Menu and cuisine: good to better. Bill: Whoops! How did the total seem not merely un-discounted, but more than twice what both entrees cost?
Glad you asked. When the waitress asked whether we wanted white or fried rice with each entree, we naturally assumed this accompanied the entrees. The rice, we were surprisingly informed, cost an additional few bucks each. And then there was the tax, which was applied to what the entire bill would have been without the one-free entree. GOTCHA!
A few weeks ago, more than 40 of us reserved a celebration lunch at a popular Mission Valley spot, expecting to be … expected. Yet management provided only one waitress for this crowd, and after an hour of not yet ordering, we two left.
We stopped nearby at a reliable Mexican chain, in which no more than three tables were occupied. The host desk was unattended and nobody showed up, until one harried young man straggled over to say someone would be with us shortly (but alas, not him!) Nothing doing. After another considerable wait, we left.
Just down the street, we next tried a respected Asian restaurant , which, we could see, had a half-full dining room. “Two of us,” we begged, gnawing by then on our knuckles. Sweetly, the hostess said the wait would only be twenty minutes. We left.
We drove around the corner to Denny’s, where, though it was busy enough, we were seated right away, served in short order (got that?) with warmth and efficiency, and had a pretty good lunch.
Now, I have been accused of being especially crabby about restaurant service, and it’s true that there are two eateries I’ll never return to – one, because the proprietor failed to acknowledge or greet me after I’d patronized his establishment every week for three-four years (patience is my sole virtue); another lost my regular business for handling a minor request in a rude and dismissive manner. Bye.
(Note that, except for Denny’s, I haven’t named names. But I will identify them to Presidio Sentinel’s sales staff, who should immediately sell them reputation-saving advertising.)
Having handled publicity, event production and public relations for numerous restaurants over the years, I’ve come to various conclusions about this industry – which right now is experiencing some tough times (and, therefore, a good time to a) issue coupons and b) mind their service.
Lesson #l in restaurants : everything counts. I mean, everything, from the obvious need to prevent this column’s experiences from happening, to whether the waitperson says “you still workin’ on that?” instead of “may I take your plate,?” to the condition of the bathroom, to exquisite personnel training for handling problems that arise. Cuisine and presentation are just the start.
My next-best lesson is that I’ll never own a restaurant. This is an industry at the mercy of “charisma.” Hard to quantify, hard to qualify. An expert and conscientious restauranteur can do everything right – and it can still go wrong, and a customer can be lost. Too much salt, (too little salt), yesterday’s flowers, one, just one tough cut of beef, a waiter’s even brief, disdainful glance, any and all misrepresentations or misleading expectations.
I’m certain I’m not alone in my lack of forgiveness; for better or worse, there are just too many restaurants (competition) to welcome me, and, given that things go well, to whom I will always remain loyal. Until, that is, the first “GOTCHA!”
We are Obama fans, so when we heard that Shepard Fairey, famous for the Obama and Obey art chose our office building in South Park for a mural installation as a part of the Museum of Contemporary Art San Diego exhibit, Viva la Revolucion, a multifaceted, international exhibition featuring works both in the Museum’s galleries as well as at public sites throughout San Diego, we were excited!
James Brown of Public Architecture who designed and owns our building had submitted it for consideration for one of the site installations. Fairey and his crew started on a Wednesday and completed it on Friday. (Ok, and shall we also tell you that one of his crew was Spencer Elden, famous for being the Nirvana baby, pictured on the famous Nevermind album cover.)
The crowd that gathered to watch and catch a glimpse of Shepard was a little overwhelming and distracting to staff (oh well). The first day the young girl with the blue fair followed the crew’s every step from morning to night. We had fun seeing some of our favorite journalists as they came by to see the progress and didn’t realize our office was there, including Robert Pincus, Nina Garin, Dave Maass, Seth Combs and David Rolland.
Since the art lovers were so accessible, we took the opportunity to put postcards out about client, Lux Art Institute’s latest artist Sati Zech.
Ok, you can see more on our Facebook page; on to the work:
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- The start
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- Shepard paints
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- Stencils in J. Walcher office
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- Almost done …
I get over 1,000 e-mails a day – and this is nothing compared to journalists and reporters, whose attention PR professionals (like me) are clamoring to captivate. But as e-mail interaction has replaced the phone as the primary source of communication, it’s become increasingly difficult to get noticed.
Like a plain-Jane trying to get past the velvet rope at the hottest new LA club – overly mundane subject lines often get lost in the shuffle while outrageous ones might make you an outcast, thrusting your carefully quipped, well-written pitch into the realms of SPAM. So always remember that simply hitting “send” on an e-mail is no guarantee that it will actually be read.
So what does it take to be seen and more importantly, get read? Well, as we see it, a subject line needs to be somewhat irreverent, highly intriguing and/or slightly confusing (but in a good way – not in the “that makes no sense” way). In other words, it’s got to catch their attention, get them to open the e-mail and then read it top to bottom.
For Example: “Laps with Led Zeppelin”
Got your attention, didn’t I?
Bet you want to know what that’s all about, huh …
Well, so did the media. That headline generated interest amongst top national consumer publications like Time magazine, U.S. News and World Report, Men’s Journal, The Wall Street Journal and The New York Times. 
Had we led with something safe like, “Aqua Lung Invents Snorkel with a Radio,” or something more aggrandizing like “Aqua Lung’s New Technology Revolutionizes Swimming,” our pitch may have been passed over as PR hype – or in other words, “just another new product being hocked by overzealous PR peeps promising something out-of-this-world.”
By the way, since you’re dying to know, the aforementioned subject line was used to promote our client Aqua Lung’s launch of the then revolutionary Aqua FM snorkel – the first snorkel with a built in FM receiver so swimmers and snorkelers could tune-in underwater using state-of-the-art Bone Conductivity Technology. (Of course now you can take your Ipod underwater but this was ground-breaking news at one point – we promise.)
Some basic rules to follow:
- DON’T use hyperbole
- DON’T be too technical
- DON’T be boring
- DON’T lead with outrageous claims of excellence or revolutionary concepts (no one will believe you)
- DO be clever and eye-catching
- DO use creative devices such as alliteration (when appropriate and in moderation of course)
- DO keep it short
- DO play on words
As printed in the San Diego Daily Transcript, June 11, 2010
Media Training for Tony – Alas, Too Late!
If you’ve been under a rock for the past few months, as BP’s escaped oil gushes into the Gulf of Mexico and way beyond, trashing business, tourism and not the least, countless birds and fish, you won’t know about Tony Hayward, who, quote-by-quote, deepens the hole in which his company is drowning.
Maybe the New York Times and the Wall St. Journal – among others – are the only entities benefiting from this tragedy; BP’s mega-bucks full-page ads plead their case: they didn’t mean it; didn’t see it coming; feel responsible; will make amends.
That might be sufficient “publicity” for maintaining their sincerity and integrity, but unfortunately, BP’s heartfelt messages have been undermined daily by Tony Hayward, the company’s CEO.
By now, perhaps BP is scrambling to find another spokesperson (even in a time of crises, a company spokesperson need not be the CEO), at the very least, I hope BP has Tony Hayward deep in media training.
Ah, Tony, here’s a start:
Tony: … the spill will not cause big problems because the Gulf…”is a very big ocean” and…”the environmental impact of this disaster is likely to have been very, very modest.”
Crises Communication lesson: never minimize the crises. Express company sympathy for its victims. Apologize for any responsibility the company bears.
Tony: “what is undoubtedly true is that we did not have the tools you would want in your tool kit.”
Crises Communication lesson: However possible, move to the positive. What you DO have, what you CAN do. It is the CEO’s task – and duty – to maintain, inspire or restore confidence in his/her company.
Tony: “I’d like my life back.”
Crises Communication lesson: Besides the fact that it isn’t about you, never, I mean NEVER speak spontaneously in a crises. Anticipate every question, every issue. Compose your comments and rehearse. Refer to them if needed. (Mr. Hayward apologized for this comment in the wake of media and public outrage).
Tony, in response to outcry that he quit: “I’m not quitting despite outcry. It hasn’t crossed my mind. It’s clearly crossed other people’s minds, but not mine.”
Crises Communication lesson: Don’t repeat negatives. Don’t speak for others – whether its clearly crossed their minds or not, it’s not for you to say. Say what you ARE doing, like, you’re totally committed to make things right? (While he eventually did talk about his commitment, recognizing and repeating the negatives weakened the hoped-for strength of his message.)
Tony, re whether he – or the company -will be prosecuted: “I’m not anxious about being arrested … the criminal investigation will proceed and draw whatever conclusion it draws. The only thing I’m losing sleep about is the leak.”
Crises Communication lesson: Listen up: Don’t repeat negatives. (“I am not a crook!” is now Nixon’s most memorable line.) If you stuck to, “The only thing I’m losing sleep over is the leak,” your point and commitment would have been a) far more succinct – and far more powerful.
Tony: “The spill is relatively tiny:”
Crises Communication lesson: Ah, Tony. The CEO MUST have all the facts before he/she opines. You don’t want to have to backtrack or wrest your foot out of your mouth.
Tony: “This won’t stop deep water drilling … We will be at the vanguard because we will know more about it than anyone else.”
Crises Communication lesson: Never speculate – and I say that knowing that you didn’t think you did. But you did. A premature comment to begin with; a sigh if not wry-inducing comment to end with.
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Jean gets adjustment from James
Rob dons the best eye protection in the world - Aqua Sphere goggles (client, yes, but they are great goggles)
It’s moving day at J.Walcher Communications as we get the boot (building’s been sublet) from our grand office on El Cajon Blvd. and make the trek down 30th to our new home in South Park. We’re all rather sad, and we will miss our shared and collaborative office space with Farm Advertising … who moves into the Banker’s Hill/Hillcrest area. Here’s some highlights of our move: Jean gets some pain help from Jacquie’s BF, James, a physical therapy student, and Robert dons a pair of Aqua Sphere goggles to protect his eyes from the shards of dirt and wire that just penetrated his eyeball while packing. Doctor visit to remove only took an hour. See ya on the other end!
